Getting to know you...

Day 9 ( I know, not quite) Entry 9? Better? Yes.

Life is about making running changes. You have to mend the sail while you are still at sea. Things can seem so out of sorts and out of order, out of control, complete chaos. Not always do we have the time to stop and assess. Act. React. Problem solved. *Sigh* If only it were that easy.

I say this because people seem to show their true colours at the best of times and at the worst of times.I suppose it's how we deal with this in the moment that shapes how we evaluate the value of each friendship or relationship. As the age old saying goes, people are in your life for a reason, for a season, or for a lifetime. It's just how it is. Simple. We will all break hearts, we will all have our hearts broken, at least once. By friends, by enemies, by people you thought you would hold dear to your heart forever. It never becomes less shocking or less hurtful. Feel richer for having had the experience. And for the love of all things chocolate, learn the lesson! In each experience, there is something to learn, something you didn't know, something you thought would never happen. And then BAM, there it is, slapping you in the face. Instead of slapping it back, embrace it, accept it, make the necessary changes and move along.

Be the best friend you know how to be. Be a good listener, offer words of compassion and understanding. And when you feel you aren't being heard or appreciated, or treated with the same respect and understanding you have shown, let it go. This relationship was obviously only meant to be for a season. For whatever the reason, maybe they have taught you some grand life lesson, or maybe it is you who has taught them, unknowingly. People will be hurtful and cruel and its just human nature. The sands of time only know why. Feel shocked, feel hurt, feel whatever it is you are supposed to feel. Then, dare I say, get over it. Don't keep people in your life that make you question yourself. If you know in your heart that you have been the kind of friend that you would want to be around, then you have done all you could. Why be around someone that treats you with anything less? Why?! We all do it. We all hang around, hoping something, or someone will change, that they'll snap out of it and realize the error of there ways. Sometimes the only way the find the error of their ways, is when they have lost something great in a friendship that they had with you. By then it's too late, but at least there was a lesson to be learned for both parties involved.

I think we all try to be understanding, compassionate, loyal, and honest with the individuals we have in our lives. Sometimes this is reciprocated, and sometimes it's not. Choose who you hold closest carefully. Having said that, we can't always be waiting for the bottom to fall out. Just because it did once (or ten times) doesn't mean it always will. SOME people are for a lifetime. You will know who when it comes down to the nitty-gritty. Often times it's the people you would have least expected. The ones that will help you up when you fall, will be your strength when you have little of it left, will be your faith when it is wearing thin, will defend you instead of breaking you down, these are the lifers. The keepers. Again, I will say, it's only in times of extreme happiness or grief that you will know exactly who these people are. They are few and far between these days, so keep your eyes peeled for them. They will be looking for you too. And when the time comes, remember how much they meant to you. How much you learned from them, how much they helped you and how much you needed and appreciated it. Do the same for them. They won't expect it, but it will be appreciated. And you will feel better for having helped a true friend.

Look people in the eye when you are speaking to them, it shows honesty and integrity and that you truly, wholeheartedly mean what you are saying. Speak graciously to them and about them. Be kind. Your words always go miles further than your mouth or mind could have ever guessed. Your intentions should be always be as obvious as the fact that the grass is green and the sky is blue. Don't allude, it allows too much room for assumption. And when we assume...well, you know how the rest of that goes. We are all different and have different expectations and standards. Don't let people change you, who you are and what you believe in. It makes you unique and that is something to be admired. Don't be afraid of being yourself. Not everyone will like you. There is no pleasing all of the people all of the time. It takes courage to be yourself. Be the most courageous person you know. The ones who stand by you are the ones you will stand by. Forgive only those who deserve it. Those who don't deserve it, forgive them anyway, its a heavy load to carry if you don't. Forgive them, then forget them. Sounds harsh, but such is life.

Super XO